My pre-Purim pep talk

I put up two videos on facebook recently about how happiness is depressing. I took them down when people thought I was crazy.

I put up a video a couple of days later with a new song I wrote about how the holidays can make you sad because they remind you of what you don’t have.

Sigh… It’s true. I’m sorry to put a damper on things, and I hesitate doing so, but Purim being here, tonight, does make me sad. And I’m trying to figure out exactly why. Here is what I’ve come up with.

Expectations

Yup. As so often is the case, it may just be about expectations. I have a picture in my head of what a really good holiday – lets say, Purim – should be like. Should consist of. And of course my Purims currently don’t fit the bill. My Purims are not what I would really want them to be. And it’s upsetting because I feel like I’m missing out.

Yes, I do want certain things in my life and I don’t have them. And that can be upsetting. But that doesn’t mean that Purim has nothing to offer even without those things. Yes, it would potentially be way more fulfilling and exciting to celebrate in the way that I picture it, but that is not how things currently are and if that is true, then, ugh, I hate to say it, but that is how it’s supposed to be.

I truly want to go out and celebrate Purim with an open and happy heart. I want to keep wishing (praying, whatever) for the things I wish for and at the same time, as much as possible, enjoy my current moments for what they are. And I truly believe that if you really want that and if you make a conscious effort, you can do it.

Goooooooooooooooooooooo Deena! And, GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO READERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Happy Purim!

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2 thoughts on “My pre-Purim pep talk

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  1. I find that a lot of personal disappointment in our individual lives is driven by having very defined and sometimes rigid pictures of our expectations of how things ought to be.

    I venture to guess that your picture of a good Purim holiday was quite busy with details that cover your entire Purim day from the time you woke up to the time you went to bed, along with how you and people in your picture were dressed, who said what, and so on. I imagine the picture has a very strong sense of happiness, satisfaction, and perhaps safety as part of it.

    I think it is great to have these pictures in our heads. As long as we realize that these pictures are our desire for how we want things to be in reality, and aren’t the reality. And the most important thing is to remember that these pictures can be reality, as long as we work hard at building beautiful realities for ourselves (and hopefully for each other!), and have a firm grip on the current realities.

    Live it in the now, folks, live it in the now :))))

    1. Thanks for the comment. I am not sure I pictured every detail, the way you wrote… I wonder if that is true without me realizing. But definitely we need to, as you said, live in the now, and face facts about what reality truly is.

      Shabbat Shalom!

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