I will not break

(Part two of this post is here.)

Sometimes my fear of getting hurt paralizes me. For example, I recently submitted an article to a paper and the article was rejected. I submitted it again and again it was rejected! Though the editor said I could try submitting it again after more changes were made, I wasn’t sure I wanted to or that emotionally I was able to.

And yet, I just now submitted it for the third time.

Of course this is not at all an easy process. I put myself out there, I try so hard, and then when my hard work is not accepted, it hurts.

But does it break? It doesn’t have to. I spoke to my friend Tamara C. (hey Tamara!) after the second rejection and she told me that the most important thing was to just keep trying, if that’s what I wanted. If it was important to me. (She’s a dancer so she should know.)

I think it’s like walking on the slippery sidewalks these days. I am so scared I’m going to fall. But except on days when the sidewalks became total ice, my fear hasn’t stopped me from going out. I go out, I just make sure to be careful. I walk slowly over the slippery surfaces and I say to myself, “Yes, you might fall. But if you do, then what?”

If God forbid I fell, then it’ll hurt. Not sure how much but it’ll hurt. But that’s it. It’ll hurt and I’ll move on.

I have a fear in life of being hurt but it’s so important to realize that if someone is hurt that doesn’t mean they’ll curl up and die. It means they’re hurt. That’s all it means. It’s not fun but it’s nothing more than that. And then you get up, brush yourself off (go to the hospital if necessary) and work on moving on.

I won’t let fear control me… At least not too much. : )

Click here to read about the connection of this topic to relationships.

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4 thoughts on “I will not break

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  1. A relationship.

    The shrink in me says its a formation of one or more nodes coming together in hopes of exchanging information/data with each other.

    Its very simple to get paralysed with a new relationship, as sometimes I don’t know their expectations; the reality is.. I know my expectation and I have to be open and ask them about theirs, if they don’t mix at that time/space I move on.

    Its too easy to think that its all about the recipient (your self) but rather its more about the sender of the message; why communicate if you have nothing to say. I like to remember that the recipient of the message is listening because they want to hear my message; as well for them as to understand my tenants of where the message emitted from.

    Also know as, I should have a reason to communicate, right? (heeh..) Nahh.. lets try.. just a free for all. ;)

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